Closed shop

I responded to Northern’s consultation on ticket office closures. I tried to be eloquent and articulate (if I let my true feelings out, it would have been too sweary).

I also signed the petition on the UK Parliament website, because it is this useless zombie government, which knows the cost of everything and the value of nothing, that is presiding over this situation. Managing decline on the railways just as it is doing everywhere else.

There are 13 separate consultations going on – Transport Focus has a list of the proposals and how to respond, so check to see if your local train operator is affected. Thankfully Merseyrail, operated by more enlightened management, is not affected.

My response is below. I am under no illusions that this is little more than a box-ticking exercise and the proposals will probably be waved through, but we have to try.

The consultation closes on 28th July (yes, they really gave us three weeks to respond on this massive sweeping change to the railway network!) so get your responses in soon.

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Captain Kirkby

I just got back from spending a lovely few days in Kirkby Stephen with Ben. We squeezed a lot of activity into four days, and some of the highlights are below.

Platform Cottage – I was fortunate to find this cottage at Kirkby Stephen station available at just a few week’s notice. I was staying there for the second time, after an earlier adventure in 2021. The station buildings have been divided up into three holiday lets. This time we were in the smaller Platform Cottage, but the experience was much the same – a cosy living room and bedroom, with a fully-fitted kitchen and all the home comforts. Once you get used to a train pulling up at the station every 2 hours and having passengers streaming past your living room window, it was a very pleasant experience.

Unexpected bonus was a library of books provided for our reading pleasure. Ben contented himself with a book of Ned Sherrin anecdotes, while I was pleased to find this book of interviews with some of Britain’s finest 20th century comedy writers, everyone from Spike Milligan and Denis Norden to Victoria Wood and, er… Chris Evans. I was sorely tempted to steal it.

Cover of "Now That's Funny! Writers on Writing Comedy" by David Bradbury and Joe McGrath

We were exemplary guests – I even went through all the streaming apps on the smart TV that the previous visitors had forgotten to sign out of, and did it for them.

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Euro-star

Well.

When it was announced that Liverpool would host Eurovision, I was overjoyed, but also a little bit nervous. The city had never held an event of this size before. Would we be able to pull off the feat of hosting one of the biggest and most technically complex live television events in the world? Could the city’s infrastructure cope with a massive influx of visitors from all over the world? I hoped so, but a part of me was a litte bit worried.

"Liverpool ❤️ Ukraine" spelt out using points of light from drones flying in formation.

My concerns were unfounded. Liverpool didn’t just host Eurovision, it embraced it and turned it into a week-long festival of joy. With a massive festival of public art running alongside the event, concerts and plays to entertain us, as if the massive festival of music itself wasn’t enough.

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Liverpool Vision

Eurovision is being held in Liverpool, and it has been an amazing experience. The atmosphere in the city has been electric, with numerous events being held surrounding the contest ensuring that no-one is left out, even those who couldn’t get a ticket to the show itself.

Sadly, it all comes to an end today, but it will be a massive climax with the Grand Final at 8pm, live across Europe and beyond. 26 artists will compete on behalf of their country to secure the Eurovision crown and the honour of hosting next year.

Here are the ones I think you should watch out for.

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A Thong in My Heart

A Thong For Europe is the latest in the Liverpool Royal Court’s long-running series of plays with a truly groan-worthy pun for a title. It is a new musical by Jonathan Harvey, the genius behind Beautiful Thing, Canary, Our Lady of Blundellsands and a million episodes of Coronation Street.

The show was commissioned and written after the announcement last October that Liverpool would host Eurovision. From initial idea to a fully-formed musical in six months? Could it be done? If anyone can do it, Jonathan Harvey can.

Poster advertising "A Thong for Europe", depicting the main cast dancing in front of the show's logo.

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Eurovision – the arty party

Liverpool has embraced Eurovision beyond my wildest imagination. It has taken over the city in a way I’ve never seen before. More than the various Giants events. Not even a Liverpool FC trophy parade touches this for sheer scale. Naturally, I’ve immersed myself in it as much as possible.

Things got under way in earnest at the beginning of May with EuroFestival, a fortnight-long cultural festival of artworks tying in with the contest, with a particular emphasis on Ukraine, the rightful hosts of this year’s contest.

I’ve been exploring some of the artworks with Ben, and here is a round-up of what we’ve seen so far.

Banner outside the Albert Dock in the yellow and blue Eurovision colours, with large text reading "Shine Bright, Liverpool"

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Speke your mind

Easter Monday was spent in the company of my lovely boyfriend Ben at Speke Hall, the Tudor House and surrounding gardens on the edge of Liverpool.

Speke Hall, a grand Tudor manor house in wattle and daub construction.

It’s been a long time since I visited. Previous visits as a child were associated in my head with boredom, as my mum cooed over the delicate Tudor furniture and I longed to get home to my Commodore 64. In adulthood, the site was never really on my radar as a place to visit, despite being just a few miles from my house. It doesn’t help that it is curiously difficult to get to by public transport – the only option being to take one of the buses to Liverpool Airport, alight a couple of stops early, and walk nearly a mile.

I don’t want to brag, but Ben has a car. We were able to drive to Speke Hall on Easter Monday, arriving just after the 10.30am opening time. The hall is in the care of the National Trust, and admission is £15 if you want to access all areas. If you don’t want to see the house, a tenner will get you into the grounds only.

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Museum Piece

Why was I wandering around an industrial estate in Birkenhead last weekend with my friend Scott? The answer may surprise you!

I was here to visit the Bloom Building, an events space on the edge of Birkenhead town centre, conveniently located between Cammell Laird shipyard and the Queensway Tunnel toll plaza. The event this space was hosting on 25th March was The Big Chat about the Transport Shed from National Museums Liverpool (NML).

Exterior of Bloom Building, an industrial corrugated metal building painted in blue and yellow with bright patterns.

The subject of the event was NML’s extensive Land Transport collection, which includes more than 200 items. As part of the event, there were activities for kids, a guitarist playing transport-related pop songs – a thankless task when no-one in the room was paying the slightest bit of attention – and trinkets from the museum’s collection on show.

The main attraction, though, was a talk given by senior persons at NML, about some exciting plans that they have for the future of the collection.

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For the love of PO’G

Desperately sad news about the untimely death of Paul O’Grady at the age of just 67. Social media has predictably been full of tributes, with nobody having a bad word to say about him.

O’Grady, originally from Birkenhead, made his name performing as Lily Savage in the Royal Vauxhall Tavern in London in the 1980s. This was a time when gay men were routinely persecuted by authority, and on one occasion the pub was raided by police while Savage was on stage. This time marked the height of people’s ignorance about AIDS, and the police turned up wearing rubber gloves. Savage’s glorious riposte, “It looks like we’ve got help with the washing up,” got her arrested.

Savage was later recruited to conduct celebrity interviews on The Big Breakfast, gleefully sailing close to the line every morning, as this interview with Julian Clary shows. Later she moved to prime-time BBC One, and Blankety Blank was required viewing for me on Saturday teatimes. Unfortunately a lot of Savage’s humour had to be cut from the early evening broadcast, but luckily for us somebody saved the the outtakes, which are incredible.

Travel documentaries such as Paul O’Grady’s Orient allowed O’Grady to appear on TV as himself rather than Savage. More followed – a chat show on ITV, which moved to Channel 4, then back to ITV.

He became well-known for his love of animals, forming close ties with Battersea Dogs Home and running a farm in Kent. However, as his fame and wealth grew, he never forgot his working class roots. There was no better illustration of that than his fine rant about the Tories on live TV in 2010, which hopefully gave some ITV executives palpitations.

Whether it was as himself, or as Lily Savage, O’Grady’s presence was a massive step forward for LGBT representation on screen. Don’t underestimate the power of seeing a drag queen on mainstream television.

Channel 4 News on YouTube has a look-back over O’Grady’s life and a nice interview with his friend, the actor and Labour peer Michael Cashman.